Double Whammy
Mother’s day.
It’s quite the loaded phrase in my circles.
In the loss community it is a day that just hurts. In infertility circles it is salt in a tender wound. And around here it is a few other things too.
It is a chance to appreciate my mom and grandmother, a genuine and caring mother-in-law and sisters who are a mother to many and mothers-to-be someday if their dreams come true.
I have quite the mom.
Nobody is perfect, but I’ll be danged if she doesn’t try. (Inside family perfectionist joke…get it?) She is usually doing anywhere between three and seven jobs, all of them well. Her laugh is absolutely contagious and her smile, well it’s one of the things I like most about my own face.
This pregnancy would be a far greater trial without my mom. She’s been here much more than she had to be, and I have needed her every moment.
My grandmother is a rock star. She’s in her eighties and more physically fit than I am these days. Her calendar is as full as any executive and her heart gives Lake Michigan a run for size. You love her, trust me.
And Sunday will be a big day for my children. It is Joel’s eleven month birthday. I need to finalize plans for his first birthday; I can’t believe it is only a month away. I have a few things in the works but am always open to more ideas, got some?
Sunday will also mark the Peppers’ pregnancy at 24 weeks. Official viability. While some babies have survived when they were born sooner, 24 weeks is the mega milestone. I certainly hope they don’t show up for at least another 12 weeks but now we start the countdown where every week means improved success for pretty much everything.
I know there are no guarantees. For as often as I talk about our lives with them, I really have a tough time believing we will bring them home. But barring a medical emergency, they will be picking their own birthday and my bet is I still have quite a while to get used to the idea.
I don’t know how to parent a living baby yet, but this mother is ready to try.
Two at a time.
All of your babies are lucky to have you as their Mommy. I hope that you celebrate yourself on Sunday too! I often spend so much time celebrating others on Mother's Day that I forget to celebrate myself
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Do you know how much I love you and Leo and Joel and the Peppers? Thank you for appreciating the Moms who came before you and for being the best possible MOM you can be!
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You got this, babe. I know it.
I would LOVE to help you celebrate Joel's birthday! This blanket "I'd love to help" is generic, but seriously!? Can I?
(I'll email you, m'kay?)
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I <3 you.
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I felt like I wanted to say something but when I went to type, no words came. wierd, maybe I'm just tired from my trip to the ER last night - dealing with my own loss - but somehow still want to find the words to say thank you for your blog, your bravery and perspective. And that's really supposed to sound so very heartfelt. Thank you for the outside perspective to include other mothers/grandmothers/sisters in your thoughts this Mother's Day. It can be a beautiful day no matter what, if we choose to look at it with different perspectives. Thank you!
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If there is anything I can do to help, just say the word. You are so brave. Although I wish his first birthday involved him being HERE, I know it'll be a celebration... of his life, his beauty, and the gifts HE continues to give every day, to those of us who knew him, who know of him, and who thank God for all he has taught us every single day.
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How do you feel about environmental pollution?
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